Someday, there will be no “buts” and “what ifs” . Strengthen your grip and keep your faith. God is neither too early nor too late. Because in His time, everything will fall into place and will make perfect sense.
She stuck her nose in a book
Avert her eyes to his look
His eyes smiling to hers
Leaving turvy stares.
They never had a chance,
Even just a glance.
Time tells, spells, and sees
Why their hearts never in bliss.
The choice they made,
Left everything at stake.
They could have it all,
In lieu they grasped a free fall.
Like a crampled paper,
And a plummeting skyscraper,
They landed drastically,
A love wasted momentarily.
When love is left in disgrace,
Not even a soul stays.
Sometimes, you cross bridges you never planned of crossing; you dream the unthinkable, you do the impossible, you hold on though it’s unreachable and you love despite of its unrequitedness. You know it is a roller coaster kind of ride but you never fastened your seatbelt. When you’re about to fall in a cliff, you never stepped on the break. When you can’t find your breath, you never asked for someone’s help. Everyone is leaving you behind but instead of stopping them, you pushed them away. You ask rhetorical questions when there are answers around you.
You have reasons.
You’re doing it not because you’re an introvert, a loner, or you’re kind of depressed but because you find peace when you are alone. You feel alive when you are in pain. You find silence in chaos. And you see the beauty of every scars.
You call it Serenity. Your kind of Serenity.
One more glance,
Signals another chance.
When everything in between collides,
Nothing comes but odds and frauds.
So when you deeply love someone,
Never do things for fun.
’cause it breaks a heart,
and brings couples apart.
He said the pain is as vivid as it was then,..
The girl asked, “Why do you have to evoke such memories?”
He answered, “You don’t understand..”
“Then, tell me.” She demanded.
“You can’t escape pain. The more you ignore it, the more it twinges. The more you rebuff it, the more it clings unto you. The minute it grasps you, you start being nostalgic. And nostalgia hurts. Why? Because you reminisce all the nastiest and jauntiest memories; even the ones you wished never ever happened. Then you recall the breakups and heartaches of putting an end to something you thought would last eternity .” He said.
“Why do you have to end it? When it’s all but great, why do you need to cut the ties?” She asked.
“Because some things are bound to end. Whether you like it or not, things change, it breaks then it ends. Things end dramatically, you know. You build it for what seemed like forever then it ends as swift as a flash of lightning at night. I may yearn for more, but love is for two; two minds, two hearts, and two hands to go a long way. When the other hand lets go, you run for it. Then while going after it you realize one excruciating truth: that you can’t chase someone who intends to run away from you. That you can’t hold someone’s right hand for a long time if that person’s left hand is clinging to someone’s right hand. It sucks, you know, to love faithfully and be rejected unreasonably. Life is not unfair, love is.” Tears running down his cheeks while saying these words to her.
They remained quiet for a couple of minutes…
The man, wiping away his tears with his bare hands.
The girl, her deep blue eyes staring blankly to someplace outside the window only she knows.
Then she said, “Love is fair, the lovers are not. Some things end, yes. But do you know that a thing is only over if you choose to end it completely? It’s a decision, you know. If happiness is a choice then pain is a decision. Allowing something or someone to hurt you is a decision. And I can see that you know it but you are ignoring it because you like the feeling of reliving old memories in your head. You said that pain is inevitable but all this time I know that you are moving towards it instead of moving away from it. You said nostalgia hurts but you still continue to reminisce. You said that love is for two people but you still cling into it even if you know that you are now alone in the peak of the mountain. Why?…Why?”
“You know so much, don’t you?” He joked.
“Oh. I read a lot of books. So, why?” She answered.
“Because where there is pain, there is love. Because pain helps me to remember that I was once loved and cherished and treasured. And most importantly,because pain reminds me that I am still alive. Vulnerable, yes, but can be fixed and be loved in return someday, somewhere, by someone.” He grinned.
She smiled and uttered the words,.. “I want to be that ‘someone‘..”
“You will be that “someone” ..perhaps, in the next lifetime?” He said.
“Yeah. Next lifetime. When you are more sober and less vulnerable..” She answered.
“And you, a little bit older, young child.” He added.
They laughed and giggled. The train stopped.. At 5:34 AM, the sun rose. They saw it and they both knew that it’s time to part ways.
They talked like they knew each other in ages.
They parted like they never got a glimpse of each others sorrows.
She liked how he expresses his thoughts: bold and wild.
He fancied her little weird gestures: creeping into his bloodstream.
She longed for him.
He lust after her.
But they can never be together.
Like how the sea can never kiss the deep blue sky,
Like how the sun can never pour raindrops and cry,
Like how the world can never stop spinning,
Like how time can never stop fleeting,
They can never be together. Not in their wildest dreams. Not in this lifetime. Never. Ever.